In today's show, Master Coach and author Karen CL Anderson and I share a discussion around being daughters of difficult mothers. Karen's work is to help adult daughters of difficult mothers use their relationship as a catalyst for growth, creativity and wisdom.
When it comes to fielding the actions and words a difficult mother offers us as her daughter, it most certainly does feel personal. It's meant as personal. I love how our conversation evolves around that, and how we've each come to claim and stand in our own individual truths in relations to it.
Read Karen's Love Note "It's Not Always a Matter of Not Taking It Personally" that inspired this conversation
Karen's bio:
Karen C.L. Anderson helps smart, creative women take care of themselves in the relationship they have with their mothers…and to use that relationship as a catalyst for growth, creativity, and wisdom.
Find Karen at her website
Get Karen's Love Letters - you'll be glad you did.
Author of Difficult Mothers, Adult Daughters: A Guide For Separation, Liberation & Inspiration (March 2018); The Difficult Mother-Daughter Relationship Journal(January 2020); and Overcoming Creative Anxiety: Journal Prompts & Practices For Disarming Your Inner Critic(June 2020), Karen incorporates story-telling, journaling, awareness tools, shadow work, and simple energy and somatic practices in her Mother Lode 1:1 mentorship program. Her approach is safe, fun, and effective.
Karen recognizes that what’s possible personally is what’s possible collectively, and that “the Mother Wound” is not actually about mothers, but about systems that oppress all women.
She understands the adage, “hurt people, hurt people,” but prefers to say “people who are unaware of their hurts sometimes hurt other people,” while also acknowledging that cultivating compassion and empathy does not mean you have to hang out with hurt people, and that healthy boundaries (up to and including going “no contact”) are at the heart of healing.
She was featured as a subject matter expert in the New York Times: Remember, It’s Okay To Set Boundaries!